Letter to Carol from Brooke Christensen (Read at ASU Memorial Service)
Carol-
The best thing that happened to me my first day of college was you. Ill never forget the first day we met--it was our first day of classes Freshman year. I was sitting down and you came right up to me in English class and introduced yourself. I was so impressed with how friendly you were, and I knew right away we would become good friends.
Throughout the year, we became close and we agreed it would be fun to live together our Sophomore year. Our fist semester as roommates had its ups and downs, as we knew it would. But after some time apart during Christmas break, we returned to school and became closer than we had ever been. We even started looking for houses to live in next year We hung out all the time and rose above any petty issues wed previously worried about. And leading up to your birthday weekend, things were better than theyd ever beenId never seen you so happy.
I have to say, Im grateful that your last few days were some of the happiest for you. Your birthday weekend kicked off with the opening of your favorite gift--a Louis Vuitton wallet to replace the one youd lost over new years. Id never seen you freak out more than when you received that wallet. Then the next day your best friend Nicole came in town to celebrate for your birthday with you. You could not wait to see her and have all of us meet her. I didnt think it was possible, but you were even happier when she was here. Things continued to get better when you found out that your dad was going to get you a party bus to share with your closest friends. And then Saturday night came around and you went and saw your favorite show, Rent. It was so important for you to be surrounded by your friends when the clock struck midnight and your 20th birthday arrived, and when the show ran late you were worried you wouldnt make the celebration on time. But sure enough you showed up around 11:30, your hair still wet after rushing through your primping for the evening to make it on time. You couldnt wait to be with your friends and it was so important that you celebrated your birthday with all of us. Around 1a.m., you told me that you were going to Maxs and asked if I wanted to go but I told you I was tired and that I was going to go home.
I remember that last thing I told you was that I loved you and that you had become one of my very best friends and that I would see you when you got home. We hugged, I left, and that was the last time I saw your beautiful face.
When I found out the next day what had happened I didnt believe it. I told the cops that it couldnt be true and I was waiting for you to walk through the door. I couldnt imagine never seeing you again. I was just waiting to wake up from this horrible nightmare.
Its been a little over 2 weeks and I still havent woken up from this nightmare. I cant begin to explain how much I miss you. I honestly dont know what I am going to do without you.
I went to NY and met your entire family and all your friends. You were right--they are amazing people. They were all so loving and caring, just like you. I now see why you wanted me to meet them so badly.
Carol, you were so great to me and I never told you that enough. You were one of the truest friends I had. You were always straight with people and you were never afraid to tell them how it was, and I loved that about you. I feel so lucky that I had the chance to live with you and get to know you so well.
Thank you for letting me crash in your room so many times when I was scared of some stupid noise I heard. Whenever I slept in your room I felt safe because I knew that you would never let anything happen to me. And Im so sorry I wasnt there for you that night. There are so many what ifs that run through my head on a daily bases. And I keep trying to think about what was said that night, but if anyone knows you like I do, they would know that your first instinct was to try and protect Nicole. Im not sure if you realize this Carol, but you protected a lot of people that night.
You have taught me so much and there are so many things Im going to miss about you. Like the times when we would wake up in the morning and call each other because we were too lazy to walk 5 feet to each others rooms. Or the way you called me Brookayy Cookay in your New York accent. I am going to miss how you brightened my day just by your smile and how you would come home from a long night of partying and jump on my bed and wake me up to tell me all about it. Ill miss hearing you sing at the top of your lungs while you were in the shower. Ill miss your contagious laugh and our late nights watching our favorite guy, Conan Obrian. But most of all, Im going to miss knowing that you were just a short walk down the hall, or in our case, a phone call, when I needed to talk. You would always listen to whatever I had to say and make me feel better, and Im going to miss that so much.
But for now, know that Im praying for you, your family and your friends, every night. I miss you so much carol. I wish I could just have you come back but I know it doesnt work that way. There are no answers to the question of why this happened. All I know is that this should have never happened.
I am a better person after knowing you, and I feel so privileged to have had you as my friend. I just hope I can touch as many peoples lives throughout my life as you did in 20 short years here on earth. I will never say goodbye to you carol because I know I will see you again some day. I LOVE YOU SOOO MUCH. And know that I will always carry you in my heart And I will NEVER forget you.
Love forever and always princess,
Your Brookie
